sodamnrelatable: there are animals called dikdiks pronounced.. dick-dicks? no pronounced xylophone
There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you.– Intimate Connections by David Burns (via daddylookingforhisbaby)
I pray more now to understand, than to be understood.– Lauryn Hill (via -imperfection)
Walking in the Financial Aid Office
dignifiedking: Desk Person: “Hello may I help you?” Me:
anthonygherkins: If you can’t concentrate in school because the mere sight of a girl’s bare leg is too much of a distraction, you are probably a danger to society tbh
i never really liked my name much until i found out what it tastes like when you sigh it into my mouth
You may live to see man-made horrors beyond your comprehension.– Nikola Tesla (via royalrex)
mistersids: pignite: *unzips pants* it’s i am so done!
jaaaaaaaaaackfrost: the moon is kind of a creep the sun is polite and leaves when it’s night time meanwhile during the day sometimes you can see the moon just watching
ussawesome: when you spell a word so wrong that spell check is like i dont know what to tell u man
Date yourself. Take yourself out to eat. Don’t share your popcorn at the movies...– (via broptimus-prime)
tell me how im supposed to breathe with no wifi
me during shower time: What is my mission here on earth? What would have happened if Hitler got killed before he started the war? What if is there's a bigger force controlling us right now?
me almost falling asleep: I think I've solved the mystery of Atlantis and the cure for cancer and starving in Africa and the problems for all bad things in the universe
me during the day: how do I spell house?
Nothing in the world can bother you as much as your own mind, I tell you. In...– Sri Sri Ravi Shankar (via fawun)
pizza: i’m either whispering or yelling there is no inbetween
thinsiqnificant: spongebob’s thigh gap is dope as fuck
lets-go-lesbos: I never actually say hi to my friends, I just make creepy faces at them from a distance.
grrrlfever: wouldnt it be cool to just like not feel nervous about everything all the time
princessbindi: tbh i just want to be married to some impotent millionaire who buys me things and doesn’t mind who i fuck or what i do as long as i hug him while he cries about his mom or some shit all i wanna do is gunshot gunshot gunshot cash register noise
Why am I so anxious? And then it hits me. I’m not anxious, I’m lonely. And I’m...– Augusten Burroughs, Dry (via adhooridastaan)
How relationships work: I like your butt. However, I can notice other butts. They can be nice too. But your butt is my favourite butt. It’s the nicest butt. Because it’s mine. And I can touch it.
But I have seen the best of you and the worst of you, and I choose both.– Sarah Kay and Phil Kaye, “An Origin Story” (via larmoyante)
Sometimes I’m terrified of my heart; of its constant hunger for whatever it is...– Edgar Allan Poe (via le-coeur-retreci)
highsch00ls: 5evamore: when i see really attractive people i just laugh because i know if we lived in the aztec culture they’d be sacrificed to the gods for their beauty That’s a very strange way of coping with not being really attractive.
pizza: when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that i can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that’s better and involves me